i’m sad ‘cause when i went swimming today the 5 foot part went all the way up to my eyes and i had to stand on my toes to breath
i’m being discriminated against dangnabbit
hahah you’re short
hahah i’m gonna stab you in the neck
If you can even reach my neck
here i come motherfucker
i want to be so financially secure that i don’t even think to glance at the price tag of anything.
i find it so incredibly attractive when someone is really good at something, like you can play the violin? damn son. you’re a really talented dj? good for you! i don’t care if you talk to me about quantum physics for an hour straight if i can see the passion in you at some point in that hour i’ll think “whoa, this is really hot.”
“Swearing is unattractive” I’m not attractive anyway so fuck off
Homosexuality is unnatural! It says so in this book where snakes talk, people come back from the dead, a guy walks on water, and a virgin has a baby.